old habits...

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holy holy.

i have a new body.

no i'm serious. i just threw it enthusiastically into a pool of the best teachers ever and came out someone new. i've learned a million and one new things and at least three quarters of them are beyond words.

i don't move the same way as i did on friday morning.

and? !!!

my teacher and i got a lovely compliment. kathy corey (who is an excellent teacher and i must take more classes with her) and i got to talking and i asked her about a client who had no pelvic floor after childbirth (i have several) and not much sex drive (more than one) and what she would do about it.

so she told me and then [we were at the friday night cocktail party] suggested i find her over the weekend and she would take me through it. so i did.

oh my word. stomach massage. an exercise i never once got the point of. it made no sense to me whatsoever. why? who cared? so she taught me two reps. and one leaning on a table thingy where i did maybe three reps for prep. (trust me i remember it well also)

TWO reps.

and i was covered in sweat and high for twenty minutes.

twenty minutes you guys! can you imagine? i admit those two reps took a minute, but not many. and damm did i feel some new spots.

TWO REPS!!!!!

anyway kathy goes 'beautiful' or 'very nice' a couple of times (with her hands on my body) and i go 'yeah, i'm blessed in my teacher' and she goes 'you are!' ... so i'll have to tell rr that one.

i took mat classes with alan herdman, elizabeth larkam and kathy corey and workshops with alan and marie jose blom lawrence.

i wished i could have taken workshops and classes with them all but i need anatomy and deep theory before i need more moves. i don't even know the whole repertoire yet [in other words not capable of doing some of it still], but i do like learning new ways to play in my body.

my hips feel like someone elses hips and have a decidedly more balanced sway, my ribcage and breath are functioning differently and it feels like more deeply and i think i'm closer to the plumb alignment then i was. and good god my feet. what they learned about themselves!

it's funny, some of it went into my body even though i don't remember it and other bits are lodged in my brain... the rest is in my notes. which i'm going to read. (now or never)
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yeah so i didn't touch my notes. i read 'digital fortress' by dan brown instead. it's okay, no da vinci or robert langdon and a little less mayhem. i liked it better than da vinci code and about equally with angels and demons. that said? the guy is a hack.

i woke up today and i was so tired. my brain is staring at things and having trouble speaking. it certainly wasn't a good day for a job interview so it's good that i didn't have one. what i did have was a meeting with some people who don't pay their teachers although they do have a very fair split with them.

if you're good and your classes are full you can make a killing doing this. if you aren't? not so much. the thing is it sounds like a lot of work. she's busy telling me that they'll do all the marketing for me and that they'll work around my schedule and the more i thought about it the less i wanted to do it.

it's not in my end of town and the studio is in a basement without windows. they have a lovely floor but it doesn't have much feng shui so to speak and it's quite chill. i don't know i just didn't feel like it was my place to be. which is strange right because i really liked the people.

it's also possible that i'm so tired from the weekend that nothing is going to get my attention today so i'm not making any rash decisions. there was one funny aftereffect that i really was not expecting though. i couldn't teach today. well not couldn't exactly, i mean i did fully teach after all, it's just that i was discombobulated and disorganized.

which is fair, i talked to a fellow teacher and she said that she didn't know how i did it and that after ONE day she was finished. i was too, it's just that i was still hungry. hungry the way you are when you're at the best buffet in the world. you've eaten your fill but you have to go back just one more time... for just that one more little tidbit of wonderfulness.

and that's really what the weekend was like. the buffet was filled with so many wonderful dishes and tastes and flavours and even though i ate everything i could i failed to even sample at least half of what was on the table.

there were legendary teachers and teachers who will soon be legends and somehow i didn't even hear a word from half of them (okay other than hello when we were introduced) and still i'm overstuffed with wonderful information.

really the major tragedy of my life right now is that i have to get up at seven am tomorrow and my insomnia has kicked in again hard core. i'm tossing and i'm turning and i think it's the fucking drugs for the uti but i might be making that up.

in fact i can't swear that i haven't been having trouble sleeping since before then but it's hard to tell because things keep waking me up. i guess it's a chicken and egg problem. i can't sleep so then i finally sleep but lightly and then someone yells outside and i'm awake and more exhausted and then i can't sleep even more and and and.

and of course once you get overtired it's worse.

this weekend was particularly funny because i couldn't turn my brain off at all and none of my old sleep tricks helped in the slightest. ahhh i was so cocky thinking that my sleep troubles were behind me. i guess that's what rampant excitement and an overstuffed brain do to an insomniac...

ahhh illusions :)