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Location: toronto, ontario, Canada

Friday, July 29, 2005

evil geniuses for dummies

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I can't be bothered finding a specific mention of EGFD in the user friendly archives... if you're nerdy enough you already know what I mean and if you aren't you probably don't click title links anyway.

So... muhahahahahaha. my evil plan is working! After I was told that I wasn't working up to snuff I started to do the SAME amount of work but only when my boss is HERE. So she tells me today that she's noticed a big improvement.

*snicker*
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Have to get some more Xavier Rudd cds or i'll get sick of the one i have. There is some hint that my birthday is coming and i should fail to shop for myself. So I'll TRY not to get them!

Is it wrong that I want to drive to Chicago to see him again on Monday? Alternately I want to go to Australia and follow him around for a while :)
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Birthday camping is cancelled in favour of hanging with the fam at the farm and watching the Perseids and then going to summerfolk the following weekend. This is pretty cool although I won't get to play at Metcalfe Rock. Ah well, more gym time I guess...

Maybe I'll just take myself down to Niagara one day and boulder outside. Seems kind of pointless because my endurance is for shit. It's sort of frustrating because by the time my endurance is better it will be fucking winter again. Hopefully I'll have cash and I can go play in the carolinas or something. And it's really only my hands... the rest of me is finding the return to the gym easy.
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I made it to the end of another month! AND I paid my car insurance. Now I just need to pay for car REPAIRS!
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Back to not being interested in a single man. Not one. I met a guy at hillside who had a bit of potential but really not enough to care if he calls me. Which he won't. I really, really don't think that I'm that picky. In fact I think I'm willing to date just about anyone that isn't in jail or already father to 9 kids by 7 different women. Or grossly obese AND unfit. Or stupid. Or repulsive pheremones.

Now would I date them more than once? Maybe not but maybe. Depends on how much fun we have the first time now doesn't it? Mostly I'm just tired of being asked out or hit on or groped by people who have partners already. [At least a lot of them are hot and attractive to me... so I'm at least attracting men I would date if they weren't cheating, lying scumbuckets.]

In fact, for most of my life I've been the one they chase after for rebounds, for affairs or for one night stands. Now, I *get* that i have a great rack... but I only figured that out a few years ago and before that I was all about the baggy shirts over leggings (misguided attempt to not be hippy... i've since decided to embrace the curves). So it's not just the boobs. Do I give off some sort of 'cheat with me' vibe? Do I seem easy?

Because I have to say that I am like the opposite of easy. (Yes RUS I am familiar with your theory of women who say they won't put out on the first date... but I can handle my liquor and I know enough not to drink sass panty remover on a first date [good irish whiskey for anyone who's wondering {current faves Red Breast and Tyrconnell}]). So far my average wait time is a couple of weeks but sometimes it's longer and sometimes it's shorter. So I'm not saying I'm impossible... just that you have to be worth fucking.

Casual sex makes me feel icky. So it's sort of weird you have to admit that the only people who chase after me want just that.

I have met men I found worthwhile, it's just they were all already married to people... and in love... and faithful. Or too far away, too not interested, too waiting for someone better.

For a while I decided it was my age or my general not-hotness. However, I have a lovely friend who is all of 2 years younger than me and she's doing great... AND I've lost most of the weight so I'm definetely reviving my hottie factor and still.

Nothing.

It's enough to give a girl a complex. Now I don't really want to have a kid with a gay friend or by myself but it's sort of looking like the way to bet.
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In related news, I'm seriously looking for work outside of Toronto. Outside of Canada actually. I really want to learn to surf and it occurs to me that other than some friends that I love I have NOTHING holding me here. Nothing.

So why stay? Can't think of a single reason. Wish me luck in my quest. Alternately, if you're looking for a Pilates teacher somewhere tropical or New Zealand... leave me a note!
:)

2 Comments:

Blogger R. U. Serious said...

Maybe I'm just insanely cute and charming.

7/30/2005 11:01:00 AM  
Blogger sassinak said...

having not seen a picture of you i can't actually comment. that said... it's kind of an inverse curve for me... the more i like a guy the less likely i am to fuck him on a first date.

course chemistry does sometimes win out over willpower.

7/30/2005 12:03:00 PM  

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