shh i might mention dating

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My hands are enough better that I'm going to go climbing tomorrow. I am forcing hubris to rent a harness so we can do routes because I'm still just too tired to do any bouldering. It's more that I have this weak thumb thing going back for a long time and I exacerbated it last week with chopping wood and bouldering on the same day.

yeah that was kinda dumb.

what, i said it was dumb??
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hubris i shall kill you. you stole my lighter. and i can't find another one.
fuck.
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okay onward. so i seem to have done it again. there are two different men on okcupid who are emailing me and they're both pretty interesting. Both of them are actually in their THIRTIES [seriously why is a 21 year old messaging me?] with brains and addictions to books. This freaking matching thingy isn't so bad. They're both in the 70s which is not as high as some but makes it interesting. I think sometimes when the match is too good it's almost weird and sibling like or something. at least that's what i see when i look at a bunch of my high match profiles. that and most of my matches in the 80s are my FRIENDS! [course scaredbunny is right both ways about several of my straight male friends :)]

one of the new okcupid men is even into bodywork which is pretty neat. shut up murph it's not about sex :P [and it's more meditation and spiritual anyway]

the original okcupid guy continues to write excellent emails but he doesn't seem particularly in a hurry to have a second date and although I know he's very busy that speaks volumes to me. Either I've somehow sent a 'hmmm not so much' message or he's sending one that I'm catching or we both are. That said, I really really really hope for friendship on that front because he seems like a most excellent man to hang out with.

So these two guys started emailing me within a day or two of each other and i'm (so embarassed) totally mixing them up when I write them email. I'll forget to whom i said what and who said what to me and i forget who i asked what.

hopefully they'll just think i'm scatterbrained.

but how do i keep doing this pairing thing? it's like i'm on elimidate only on okcupid. what's wrong with one at a time? heck i think that right this minute i can think of something like 4 men that i know, that are available that i would happily date. This is unheard of. If I meet four total in a year i'm amazed.

apparently in kundalini yoga there's a thing where you have to ask the Universe for what you need and then you will get it. and right when i asked okcupid guy out i felt like some big shift happened around me... it's like i have rendered myself visible to the opposite sex again.

[in fact the same thing seems to be happening with pilates since i got canned... i hope :)]

even better? when i'm out in public i'm one of the girls that the *other* girls check out. *delighted giggle*. Chicks only check out the women that they are concerned about. Often they dismiss them as 'no competition' and sometimes they think 'fair fight' and sometimes they give the little 'you bitch you have biceps AND tits' look. But I haven't been on another woman's 'threat radar' for years and I'm on it again. I really noticed this on that cruise i went on the other night.

The men were looking at me and not going "ew" which is also a nice change but they'll really do that with anything who has boobs that stick out past her stomach and i was wearing a tight shirt... but the women. the women are assessing me again.

Is it wrong to be delighted by this?

It feels conceited and egotistical and wrong. And yet I worked my ASS off to get to this point [hee literally and figuratively] and now i'm reaping the rewards for my own hard work. Yeah I still eat more than I should but that too is fading and i'm really not worried. So I exercise constantly and it's starting to show and that makes me really happy.

So then i think 'but you're supposed to exercise to feel better and not to look better' and i totally do that. but damn the looking better is sure a nice bonus.

It's like climbing, I don't do it for the eye candy. But it sure doesn't hurt!
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Be jealous, I get to go camping on friday!
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I have learned something hilarious. *I* have a copy of Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2. Yeah. Hubris' video games live here cause his PS2 died. So this game I wanted and posted about like a month ago? Yeah, here the whole time.

Also notice my thumb is worse which may indicate the location of the original thumb problem. Crap I love video games though.

Still how funny is it that I had the game? i hadn't even GLANCED at hubris' collection, just whined about wanting the game.
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Ahhh Universe you're funny sometimes!