wednesday ramblings
.
i'm taking a leaf from the book of kj
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i have this great class that i only get for five weeks and i love them and it's so much fun!
.
i'm craving peanut butter chocolate chip ice cream, but i'm too lazy to go outside. you know you're lazy when baskin robbins is less than 100 feet from your door. my ass thanks me for my laziness.
see sometimes lethargy is good!
.
it smells like piss in here.
fucking bums peeing on my building. fortunately gaia is raining on it for me.
.
i have been making changes in my home... generally something that happens in the depth of a funk and before i come out of it. some of them are really excellent.
first i gave hubris the black chair that didn't fit in my apartment. it turns out i was just storing it for him cause it goes great in his house. then i went looking for some kind of shelving unit to put there because all i ever did was store shit on said chair i dumped on hubris.
chair i may want if he ever dumps it and i've moved...
anyway i'm all poor so i can't be buying any furniture but then i walked into the laundry room yesterday and found these two shelving units that were both sort of close to what i wanted. well fuck.
so much better than whati wanted!
i cleared out that corner, stuck in the shelves, threw most of the random shit on the floor on them randomly. they're basically empty still and now the rocker just fits and my apartment has a floor!
and i SWEPT!
and because i haven't been going out i've been cooking at home so my kitchen is getting turned over and used again too. it's so nice.
maybe i'm just in the mood to be an introvert this month. that's okay as long as i start calling about more work soon, and i've stuck an iron or two in a couple of fires to simmer... and i have the promise of more work than i can handle next summer... so i'm broke but hopeful and really way better off than i was last year.
.
i'm glad i'm not napping right now since the super is cleaning. and if he's done in the next half hour i can still sleep for three hours. and read a bit first. shut up, i was at work at 6:30am and i'm working until 8:30pm.
i would have been so pissed if he'd been doing this while i was sleeping cause then i would have gotten woken up.
.
i finally made a doctor's appointment for the first time in years. i haven't had a check-up in so long i can't remember and i would like to actually have a doctor know me. i'm about that age right?
it's time to get mammograms and other horrendous things.
apparently they're like closing your boob in a fridge door as hard as you can. thank the universe i got skinny before i have to get one! doing it on the e's i once had would be trauma indeed.
.
freebsd is annoying to upgrade. but not as annoying as windows.
seriously
.
the rain is really beautiful and makes me feel all slow moving and languid like a rivulet down a car window.
.
this post is how i feel about my empty vessel feeling right now.
she sums itup really well, except that she has a family and i don't. well i do, but it's a different kind of family and we don't live together. altogether we are very different women with very different lives.
nonetheless i feel like that's just what i'm doing. go read it, it's a good post.
.
it's time for my nap.
i'm taking a leaf from the book of kj
.
i have this great class that i only get for five weeks and i love them and it's so much fun!
.
i'm craving peanut butter chocolate chip ice cream, but i'm too lazy to go outside. you know you're lazy when baskin robbins is less than 100 feet from your door. my ass thanks me for my laziness.
see sometimes lethargy is good!
.
it smells like piss in here.
fucking bums peeing on my building. fortunately gaia is raining on it for me.
.
i have been making changes in my home... generally something that happens in the depth of a funk and before i come out of it. some of them are really excellent.
first i gave hubris the black chair that didn't fit in my apartment. it turns out i was just storing it for him cause it goes great in his house. then i went looking for some kind of shelving unit to put there because all i ever did was store shit on said chair i dumped on hubris.
chair i may want if he ever dumps it and i've moved...
anyway i'm all poor so i can't be buying any furniture but then i walked into the laundry room yesterday and found these two shelving units that were both sort of close to what i wanted. well fuck.
so much better than whati wanted!
i cleared out that corner, stuck in the shelves, threw most of the random shit on the floor on them randomly. they're basically empty still and now the rocker just fits and my apartment has a floor!
and i SWEPT!
and because i haven't been going out i've been cooking at home so my kitchen is getting turned over and used again too. it's so nice.
maybe i'm just in the mood to be an introvert this month. that's okay as long as i start calling about more work soon, and i've stuck an iron or two in a couple of fires to simmer... and i have the promise of more work than i can handle next summer... so i'm broke but hopeful and really way better off than i was last year.
.
i'm glad i'm not napping right now since the super is cleaning. and if he's done in the next half hour i can still sleep for three hours. and read a bit first. shut up, i was at work at 6:30am and i'm working until 8:30pm.
i would have been so pissed if he'd been doing this while i was sleeping cause then i would have gotten woken up.
.
i finally made a doctor's appointment for the first time in years. i haven't had a check-up in so long i can't remember and i would like to actually have a doctor know me. i'm about that age right?
it's time to get mammograms and other horrendous things.
apparently they're like closing your boob in a fridge door as hard as you can. thank the universe i got skinny before i have to get one! doing it on the e's i once had would be trauma indeed.
.
freebsd is annoying to upgrade. but not as annoying as windows.
seriously
.
the rain is really beautiful and makes me feel all slow moving and languid like a rivulet down a car window.
.
this post is how i feel about my empty vessel feeling right now.
she sums itup really well, except that she has a family and i don't. well i do, but it's a different kind of family and we don't live together. altogether we are very different women with very different lives.
nonetheless i feel like that's just what i'm doing. go read it, it's a good post.
.
it's time for my nap.
posted by sassinak | 1:19 PM
15 Comments:
*snoopydance of firstness*
Dude...you swept! I am speechless.
The whole rearranging furniture can be cathartic...I love doing it. And kudos to Hubris for making out with the chair...SCORE.
I am a believer in going to the MD. My dad is a hypochondriac and my mum had not been to the MD in 12 years until we made her go this year. I am somewhere in the healthy middle.
Yaay for lovely classes :)
*huggles*
-N
dude i swept and i'm speechless too. every time my neighbour comes over she's like 'wow it just keeps getting better!'
amazing what a little storage will do.
i am a believer in the doctor as well but there's something about the exhaustive nature of pain that makes you avoid them... and i have seen them, just not for a checkup. it's always been something specific.
yeah i had another nice one today :)
I like Ramblin' posts......
I hear ya' on the too lazy to go get ice cream....
it's the time of year.
I love that you were "storing" the chair for Hubris. That's a perfect way to look at it.
I hope someone out there is storing some lovely furniture for me.
And sometimes it IS good to be lethargic. Unfortunately my ass is usually up and ready for peanut butter chocolate ice cream, but then inexplicably lethargic when my upper half considers actually hitting the gym. Suddenly all that get up and go? Umm, not so much.
I am so jealous that you have rain. I knew it would be dry down here, but I really miss the southern Indiana spring, summer and fall. As for winter, I'll stick to south Texas. I have been feeling the lethargy too, but I think it has been a lot of stress that I've had lately that has finally dissipated.
As for the post from 10/2, I would love it if someone came to my office to offer help for these patients--if possible, start with women MDs, I think they would be more receptive. There are not good surgical solutions for these folks!! Some of them have actual anatomic/neurologic reasons for incontinence, but I am not eager to operate on any of them!!
I am going to steal your post :) If only I was closer to Canada, *sigh* You'd have more clients than you'd know what to do with!!!
there's a social worker down the hall from my office who seems to have almost nonfunctioning facial muscles. it's quite fascinating how this woman can keep her face totally unmoving and then suddenly smile as though it were no more than a twitch.
last night (and it was 7:30p.m. so maybe not technically night but it sure felt like night after having had only 4 hours of sleep for two previous nights in a row) i was waiting at the elevator when she came out of her office and joined me. i was so wiped, so so wiped. i told her that pretty soon i may as well get my sleeping bag, the coleman stove and move right into my office. don't bother going home.
totally deadpan, she tells me: "work is the best cure for depression, neurosis" then with a slight raising of the eyebrows and widening of the eyes she says "and PSYchOsis". "thanks for that information." she got off on ground and i flowed out in the basement...........
We've occupied our time in my office by keeping track of how many consecutive work days a coworker wears the same blue pants.
Weds was day 13. I was out sick today, so it may be up to 14 days.
The pants have the same pee stains on the crotch, so we think he hasn't laundered them recently.
Let the mind go...love the post.
kj: fair enough. i really think it is, you just want to stay in and eat too much...
and i like rambling posts too!
jmai: thanks, i like that perspective too. makes it easier when my things get stolen also...
i hope they are too!
my ass is usually totally into getting the ice cream, just not this week! funnily enough it's easier to get me to the gym sometimes.
gut: i can see that, i would miss rain too if there weren't any at all. in fact i would miss winter if i didn't have it. south texas in the winter sounds heavenly though...
i'm sad to hear that you've been stressed.
that's a good idea too, women would tend to be more open to alternative therapies especially for a chronic problem like that. hrm... if it is an anatomic or neurological reason is there some underlying movement pattern that can be corrected that could repair a neurological issue?
steal it, steal it!
drat, i'm moving to texas!
We're so on the same wave length here...cleaned out my garage and my guest room to the point to where I just want to hang out in them. Such a good feeling.
I, too, love what you said about just storing the chair for hubris. What a great thought.
Nap...sounds good to me.
gabi: wait, you're depressed because you work too much and work is the best cure for depression?
she isn't making much sense?
dom: ew.
so much ew.
so many levels of ew that i can't even find the words!
cas: thanks! it's fun to do on occasion
kathi! nice! doesn't it feel great? i don't understand the spring cleaning thing, the urge always hits me in the fall.
i think i have already sat in it more since it moved to his house!
mmmm naps.
its my new favorite chair and it vacuums well! Thank you.
you have indeed been quite funky as of late. It bums me out to see you like that. Yet it may be that it is a counterbalance to the way you normally carry yourself. You'll come to and I believe, find peace and new beauty.
HH
not depressed. just bagged. beat to a snot. i missed the class today because my compressor had issues. the purge valve was stuck. i can do a lot of my own finicky plumbing but the compressor isn't something i fool around with. it's been a frustrating week from an exercise perspective. the universe has been conspiring to make my abs flabby.
Between you and Hubris I am a little worried that Canada smells like piss (jk) :)
Hugs Sass
hubris: you're utterly welcome.
i'm cheering up i think as i get used to it being fall. the more in tune with the universe i get the more energetic and weather shifts affect me. it's quite strange.
and thank you for that.
gabi: sometimes a week off does more good for your body than the workouts. hopefully i'll see you friday :)
hunee: it does where people piss and doesn't the rest of the time ;>
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