fall

.
today is one of those days.

one of those perfect days that only happen in late september or october and that are so easy to miss. somehow you blink and it's winter and you didn't have any fall.

when i left my house at eleven this morning it was chilly out. i was wearing pilates shorts and a tank and a sweatsuit overtop. when i left class two hours later it was too warm for the pants and i ended up never zipping up the sweatshirt.

less than an hour after that? the sweatshirt was gone.

i love this kind of day. hot as hell in the afternoon and cold enough for a jacket at night. this is fall to me. the rains came hard, cold, and early this year which probably contributed to my sense of blah. also i find it interesting how many folks i know are also blah at this time of year.

sometimes i wonder if it's something i'm trained to. because of certain rhythms that existed in my house as a child. or because of the training regime of a swimmer.

see i can never get myself to work out in august and early september. can't do it. i did last year easily because i had JUST gotten allowed to climb again and i was so excited about that that it overcame things. interestingly i had a bit of a break at the end of september as some sort of replacement or something.

and in swimming the break? when you're at the level i was at anyway, is from the end of july/beginning of august (nationals/youth championships) to late september. and it took me a lifetime to notice that that's some kind of weird programming now.

i think that's a cool thing to finally notice.
.

i heard about the coolest place to go hang out today and i'm totally stoked about it.

totally.

it's this circus practise place and two nights a week they have a sort of open night and you can go and learn stuff like how to surf on a board on a barrel or whatever. people will go in and practise their juggling or whatever and there's beer for sale (but it's not really that kind of place) and a dj.

i'm totally stoked and i'm not bringing anyone i know.

maybe later, after i'm in the group or decide if i want to hang, but for now i'm going by myself. i can't think of anyone who would want to play that kind of game except pile and he's too busy at circus school to come and play at circus play place.

but i imagine he is the type i might bring.

i didn't get the impression that people who aren't into this sort of thing were actually welcome really. not so much unwelcome just, hrm... like they wouldn't fit in.

like bringing a manicurist to a climbing party *snerk*

anyway i'm excited, and of course, once i scope the place out i may change my tune.
.

i think that with the advent of real fall weather and a sort of reformed expectation of what it will be like when i go outside that i'm cheering up. i'm still in the mood to hibernate but it's more like i feel like doing indoor activities than that i feel like hiding in my apartment and not talking to anyone.

that could be because my sister is visiting me and i might be artificially inflated by that... but then what's artificial about that? i really AM happy because she's here. so if that's a placebo does it matter? i mean once it has it's desired effect this shouldn't matter in the slightest.
.

actual thanksgiving dinner tomorrow at lorax and clarity's.

yes, i'm stoked.
.

extra machine classes with rr to prepare for a series of mat classes with dianne miller.

rr just shook her head and implied that i'm going to die. she says SHE gets yelled at!!! i'm a bit afraid.

and so excited.

so she's working the saturday class and me the rest of the week extra hard. those poor other girls :)
.

what's better? to marry your best friend or to marry your sexual fantasy?
.

i've seen hockey. hockey was on television.

i've seen boys in hockey jerseys.

yay! thank you for hockey season.
.

sharing more than three bottles of red wine with someone and forgetting to drink water?

recipe for a two day hangover.

ohhhh *groan*
.

there is no reason to be awake right now.
.

the air outside is so crisp and delicious. i love the way air smells when leaves are turning... it's indescribeably awesome.

it's cool and fresh and clean and smells of hibernation and loam and snow and turning earth. and no, i don't know how i smell that in the middle of the city but i do.

mmmmmmmm fall.