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Location: toronto, ontario, Canada

Monday, April 10, 2006

sore tongue

.
things i've really wanted to say but haven't... in the last 240 hours.
[or why sass isn't as nice as you think she is]

. get your own lane!

. please just try listening to the teacher

. i love you

. please shut up, i don't really care

. no, i'm actually not interested in you

. damm you're gorgeous

. why would you do that?

. want to go out sometime?

. you're an unadulterated ass

. stop talking to her like that, it's not respectful

. that music sucks

. try listening

. remember, he's a douchebag

. woman, TRY training your dog

. god you whine a lot

. damm i'm proud of myself, that was awesome

. please don't tell me you made coffee and then tell me that i'm not invited for any

. dude you really aren't capable of that move...

. oh god this hurts so much

. might i suggest some drivers education?

. i don't want to read your blog, it's boring

. yes, those pants really do make your ass look fat

. oh my fuck you make idiots look smart

. as my ex husband used to say "you consistently set the bar low for yourself and then fail to reach it."

. stop looking at me like that

. are you sure you should be eating that?

. dude, you're insane

. mmmmmmmmmmmm fresh laundry

. this music rocks

. it sucks blogging with no graphical user interface

. dear new operating system: INSTALL FASTER!

. i don't love you anymore

. this television show sucks ass

. please stop pointing out subtleties, i got them all already

. i'm hungry

. but i don't want to wait three hours for lunch

. um didn't i tell you i have clients that night?

. it's not ALL.ABOUT.YOU.!!!!!

. i won't blog for a couple of days cause of the new os install

. you hit me so hard it left skid marks

. sucker!

. you *like* this?

. try communicating, all the cool kids are doing it

. if you leave my door unlocked one more time i'll beat you bloody

. why on earth would you think that i would want to know that?

. oh god STOP SELLING $9.99 CDS!!!

. please start again and assume i have twice your iq

. i will love you forever

. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm pretty

. ah i see they didn't teach parking when you were learning to drive...

. does this story really need to be this long?

. *whine*

. oh dude, that was SO not the right haircut

. you're cute

. no, i really don't care about your opinion

. more coffee NOW BITCH!!!

. oh man, he got hotter!

. this is fucking endless

. grab a spine

. damm blogger saved this twice, weird...

. try thinking for yourself

. weird, i know.

. i don't think i want to be your friend anymore

. i love having you as a friend!

. tease

. i'm not sure i can keep pretending that i like you

. did you think for even a second before you did that?

. it really pisses me off how many people are going to mistakenly assume i'm talking about them, not ask me and dump me.

. and yet? maybe it doesn't.

. the thing with ennui is that it makes it easy to burn bridges...

. and really hard not to.

. mmmmmmmmmm so nice outside...

37 Comments:

Blogger Natalia said...

First Comment Snoopydance BEATCHES!

-N

4/10/2006 01:32:00 PM  
Blogger Natalia said...

Ahem..now that the gloating is out of the way...erm...I am one to say what is on my mind but that doesn't mean sometimes I just haven't opened it cause it wasn't worth it or cause I didn't want to get into it, ot cause I didn't have the energy...or...you get the point. But I hope that you didn't bottle too much up in you. And dude... wanting to say I love you but feeling you can't can suck donkey balls... hard. But yes I have been there as well. Shit that sucks...I want to say what is on my mind...and I guess sometimes that might be a scary thing for someone on the listening end of my words. I am not always easy to understand and when I want to say something but don't quite know how to get it out, I get flustered and I am sure it's hard to try to make heads or tails of what I am saying. Well, kinda like when I post these longs comments on your blog and I know half the people are going...what the fuck is she on about, this one?

Anyhoo I really do hope that when it comes to me...you can tell me anything at any time and I swear I won't be pissy. :)

-N

4/10/2006 01:36:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

nat: congrats on the first comment beatch!!

i love getting that on your blog, i never hardly ever manage it though.

hey i am totally one to say what's on my mind when i'm thinking it but some things are better left unsaid... and sometimes what you don't say really is more important than what you do say. like sometimes just the act of biting your tongue is the actual act of love in the equation...

i have a similar issue though, when i'm trying to say something that's really important to me i regularly say it wrong or in a way that someone will find mortally offensive... and sometimes i was even trying to be nice... other times it's funny how what comes out of your mouth and what you're thinking have nothing in common and yet other times your mouth says shit you didn't clear...

ah well, no worries nat, so far you seem readily able to take anything i care to dish... not that i have anything to dish ... :)

4/10/2006 01:54:00 PM  
Blogger Natalia said...

Yup that's spot on. This guy the other day told me that when I am trying to explain something to him, something that matters and affects the way I feel he can tell because my speech accelerates and yet I take pauses and rephrase a lot. I guess I can just come out and say it but because it matters so much to me I am pedantic with the words I want to use. So I might actually stop and rephrase a lot and repeat myself. But I guess in the end it's worth it. And sometimes I say it in one perfect sentence. Ahhhh the curse of the writers, I guess...no backspace button on the mouth!!!

-N

4/10/2006 02:00:00 PM  
Blogger othercat said...

I don't get it. You think less of yourself because you held your tongue and didn't say some things? I thought that was called "discretion." I should get myself some of that.

4/10/2006 02:14:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

nat: i think that guy is probably totally right... i know a lot of the time the more i try to get something right the worse it gets.... and yet somehow if i rehearse and rehearse and rehearse i sometimes manage to say the right thing when the opportunity presents itself...

you talk faster but takes more breaks... fair enough :)

i would love a backspace button on my mouth... dayummm!


othercat: oh no i don't think less of myself... just indicating that i don't only think nice things like most of the bloggers i know might be thinking...

and the idea that i have discretion cracks my shit up!

4/10/2006 02:31:00 PM  
Blogger debambam said...

Oh sass this is why I love ya!! Thanks for making me smile before brekkie....

4/10/2006 06:18:00 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

I would hope that if any of the aboveness applied to me that you would say it.

The one pet peeve of mine is, in fact, pursed lips.

That being said, feel free to let it go in my box, I can take it like a big girl.

*sniffle*

No really, hit me.

4/10/2006 07:21:00 PM  
Blogger da buttah said...

i'm the queen of mis-speaking. it's to the point where if i have something important to say, and it has to be phrased in a certain way, i just write it down and hand it to them..

or recite it.

how lame, huh? sitting and practicing and rehearsing somethign you want to say, juts so you don't fuck it up somehow....talk about striving your damndest for damage control...

there's discretion, and then there's self censoring. i think discretion is okay, depending on the circumstances..sometimes you have to sugar coat it, or reword it in such a way that it's not as caustic...but to just censor yourself to the point of not being true to whatever it is you're experiencing or feeling?

fuck that noise.

4/10/2006 07:42:00 PM  
Blogger Matt Vella said...

there's a fine line between discretion and self censoring.

i think the hardest part is being true to yourself, and therefore speaking the truth as much as possible - even if it could lead to confrontation.

4/10/2006 08:02:00 PM  
Blogger DZER said...

me? cute? awww ... thanks!

*sipping coffee*

and I'm NOT a tease!!

heh

nice list of shoulda-saids, darlin' ...

4/10/2006 08:39:00 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

You're talking about me??? Awwww, I love you too!

4/10/2006 09:05:00 PM  
Blogger terry said...

i love this post. it really IS a snapshot of your mind!

4/10/2006 09:17:00 PM  
Blogger Wes said...

For some reason, I love the haircut one. Probably because I've wanted to say that to quite a few people....

4/10/2006 10:00:00 PM  
Blogger Amber said...

I don't bite my tongue so much as clench my teeth and try not to say anyting too loudly. It's ok, we all have our uncharitable thoughts and such to deal with. And if you don't want to read my blog, it's ok I know I'm boring, but I do it so intensely :)

4/10/2006 10:28:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

bambam: thanks! and it's true and anyone who thinks they know which one is about them... is wrong.


bubbles: well i've never pulled punches with you, and some of this was to my parents or strangers on the street or whatever...

i hate people who don't tell you what they're thinking and then dump you... least give me a chance...

um you're due to eamail me!! :P


elle: i'm not so much a writer... it's more that i'll imagine the 47 possible scenarios and then when the real one shows up i can sort of find the right thing from that 47 possibilities... it's hard to explain but rehearsing helps me find the truth...

it's not lame at all... it's like trying to figure out what's happening and how to handle it. i rehearse and i don't feel lame for doing that.

it's finding the line between discretion and censoring that's tough right? you do need to have discretion but not to the point where you fail to be true to yourself.

yeah dude, fuck that noise

4/11/2006 12:51:00 AM  
Blogger sassinak said...

matt: yes there totally is. and how do you get to the truth in a way that doesn't compromise your life? what if the truth and the way you live aren't compatible?


dzer: lol

you're adorable deez

yes, you're totally a tease, just admit it and enjoy it.

thanks!


kathi: you're hilarious. i'm so glad we found each other's blogs. twice actually!


terry: yeah it really is, and it's amazing how fast it came out!


wes: oh man you too? i totally sympathise.


amber: dude i have done that so much that i am supposed to sleep with an appliance to prevent teeth clenching. can't do it, drives me nuts... but i'm supposed to.

heh, there's a few blogs i read regularly and everyone else gets drivebys. i love your comments but i definetley don't read your blog enough. if it's any consolation it isn't the one i was thinking of :)

i just with you some luck

4/11/2006 01:00:00 AM  
Blogger Matt Vella said...

It's a constant struggle, this much I know. I ain't perfect by any stretch, and being truthful to myself 100% of the time - well, I strive for it anyway.

Striving for that inherently shouldn't cause a compromise.

I have a friend here that I'm just getting to know. She's bulimic / anorexic. I know - brutal. Life expectancy for people with both conditions skyrockets to 40%. Essentially it's a flip of the coin.

That's an extreme example, but that's what can happen when the truth and your way of life aren't compatible.

4/11/2006 09:53:00 AM  
Blogger sassinak said...

matt: word dude. i know that all you can do in life is strive to be the same person inside as out... try to be the best you you can be... but every day it's a whole new struggle to do that...

that is brutal. and what are you supposed to say to her? it's not like she isn't aware of her own damage... and yet you want to.

but that's a different kind of truth i think.

4/11/2006 11:34:00 AM  
Blogger Hubris said...

Sass- I know a guy (I think he's your maid actually) who recently tried to purse his lips to keep from hurting someone he dearly loves. It blew up in his face. He knew it when it happened but at the time, didn't know what to say. He read this post & realized the exact opposite. Sometimes the blunt truth is far more effective of a communicator. The hard part is knowing the difference. He confided to me that he'll likely not always grok the balance between silence and brutal honesty, but for his kind of instance, he knows what to do in the future.

--^--%-^-{@

4/11/2006 01:27:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

hubris: i know that guy too... cool thing about him is that when he realises that he's done something asinine he cops to it and tries to make it better. you can't go wrong with that kind of attitude.

sometimes the blunt truth is all you have... but you have to know when to wield it... it's hard right?

we all just do the best we can...

4/11/2006 01:52:00 PM  
Blogger Hubris said...

*smiles*

4/11/2006 01:53:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

want to go climbing tonight?

4/11/2006 01:55:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sass you do rock! Just thought I would check out your blog since I miss you so very much.

The girl who used to live across the hall.

PS next time I'm in the neighborhood I will buzz you to get you buzzed. MMMMMM

4/11/2006 02:52:00 PM  
Blogger Everything Nice said...

Yes I am due, i apologize implicitly. and i think i spelled that wrong.

One email will be to you by midnight.

4/11/2006 03:04:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

hey TnA how are ya?

glad you dropped by and i would be delighted to see you if you're in the hood...

how is life in the suburbs?

yay buzzy buzzing!


bubbles: neener neener neener *grin*

yay for email!

4/11/2006 04:30:00 PM  
Blogger JMai said...

I LOVE "try communicating, all the cool kids are doing it"

And I TOLD you my blog would become very boring! It's only going to get worse, I fear.

But we have blogs like yours which are always a pleasure to read.

And a backspace on the mouth would be a good thing. I also need one of those for my eyes/facial expressions because sometimes I manage not to say anything but my face always gives me away.

4/11/2006 08:55:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

jmai: thanks, i'm never telling who that one was to *grin*

dude bore me with your blog please but still tell me once in a while about the nice respectful man and how cute he is? it makes me feel better.

thank you!

oh man facial expression backspace... kill for that one.

4/11/2006 10:46:00 PM  
Blogger JMai said...

Lol, I never expected you to! Hence the sore tongue.

I did post a new post about the nice cute boy and there are even photos! I thought I'd make it less boring with some pretty shots.

4/11/2006 10:51:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

jmai: way to get the point of the title *grin*

i read the post and saw the timeline and dude? *nice*

4/11/2006 11:09:00 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

twice? what'd you do, get lost once? goofball :)

4/11/2006 11:36:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

lol

kathi i don't really know, i know you visited my blog some months ago and i hit yours like once but it didn't... stick or something :)

and yes, i'm a goofball :)

4/12/2006 09:15:00 AM  
Blogger Hubris said...

an asshat too :)

4/12/2006 11:40:00 AM  
Blogger sassinak said...

yup yup

4/12/2006 03:40:00 PM  
Blogger Light Strikes A Deal said...

Oh fuck! I've been implicated. Though I don't know how.

It was good to see you again Sass. Thanks for the company and the looks of late night exacerbated recognition.

4/12/2006 05:19:00 PM  
Blogger Matt Vella said...

Re: my new friend - it is really difficult, because she has soooo many prickly defenses built up she's almost impossible to reach.

That said, I'm just trying to set an example and set very strict ground rules for our relationship (not related to her eating and insane excercise habits) - and we'll see how it goes.

4/12/2006 10:41:00 PM  
Blogger sassinak said...

lsd: welcome..


oh matt that's shitty. i know some folks in that prickly boat and there's nothing you can really do except hope they find their way out of it.

i think.

i'm happy to be corrected if anyone knows what does work. good luck with the friendship, it's hard to do that well and so good when you do.

insane exercise habits? *whistles and looks innocently around*

4/12/2006 11:58:00 PM  

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